Blessings

Wow! 25 years of marriage! Who would have ever thought that Mike and I would be married a quarter of a century? I guarantee you most did not! All I can say is our marriage is a testimony to how GREAT, FAITHFUL and AWESOME are heavenly Father is! He is the Great I Am! Nothing is too big or too great for Him to overcome! When we have Jesus living in us, we are directly in covenant with the one who can and the power that will conquer any and everything!

I guess because of this monumental occasion in our lives, I started to reflect on life, the good times, the bad, and the storms of life when I wasn’t sure what I would find the morning after. The day after our anniversary a dear friend who is going through a storm of her own posted the most beautiful song that puts everything in perspective for me. The song is Blessings by Laura Story. Here are the lyrics:

            We pray for blessings, we pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering

All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops?
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near?

What if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise?

We pray for wisdom, Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough

And all the while You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near?

And what if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us, when darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It's not our home

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near?

What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst
This world can’t satisfy?

And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise?

As I listened to this song I just wept! There was one day, May 18, 2007, I actually sat in an attorney’s office and discussed divorce. I cried and cried as I talked to the attorney. She looked over at me and handed me a tissue and said, “Honey, you really do not want a divorce.” I said, “But I can’t continue to live like this.” It wasn’t one storm; it was several, one after another. So many that all I could do was surrender to the Lord to survive. I did not have all of the answers but I knew the One who did. Somewhere in the mist of the storms, I began to trust God. Then it happened, I experienced an indescribable peace in the middle of one of the worst seasons of my life. I began my journey to the best thing that ever happened to me, my RELATIONSHIP with the one who created me for fellowship with Him! Slowly but surely Jesus redeemed our lives and our marriage as He the great Redeemer always will!

You know there is this saying, “All things happen for a reason” and I HATE it. I think people say it too much without realizing what it fully means and whether it evens applies to the situation. It is so over used for every little and big thing! I do not believe that everything bad and good happens in your life for a reason. I do believe that we live in a fallen world and that some of the things that happen to us are consequences of our choices, our sin. I believe that God uses everything that we go through to constantly draw us to him. God has intentionality for everything, even the bad things that we choose. I believe “that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28.

With that said, this song made me realize that the most difficult season of my life turned out to be the best. It brought me to the place that I am now. A place where I know the Father loves me. He gave his beloved for me. Jesus willingly experienced every bit of my pain and more and paid my debt so that I could be in relationship with Him and the Father. So, even when I prayed for the pain to just numb a little and the situation to temporarily change so that I could just go on for the moment, He Yet love [me] way too much to give [me] lesser things! “Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen. Eph 3:20-21

He used every step of this storm to draw me and Mike closer to Him. We have a marriage that I truly never thought we would have. I never thought that one day we would actually pray together and have awesome discussions about God’s love and Jesus’ gift of grace! Mike and I know that we have “overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony” Rev 12:11. We know that the Lord gave us this awesome testimony so that we could help others! We are currently praying about just how and what way the Lord wants to use us to minister to other couples.

So do not be afraid or discouraged when the Lord uses “the aching of this life . .  [to reveal] a greater thirst This world can’t satisfy?”  

Blessings 

Jesus Loves Me This I Know

I was reading the in the one year Bible today and I was blown away by how much our Savior loves us. The passage was John 17. Jesus knows that the time is near for him to take all of the world's sin and shame on the cross. He is praying that the Father is glorified through him. He prays for his disciples. And then the most amazing thing happens. HE PRAYS FOR ME!

²⁰ “I am praying not only for these disciples but also for all who will ever believe in me through their message. . .
²² “I have given them the glory you gave me, so they may be one as we are one.²³ I am in them and you are in me. May they experience such perfect unity that the world will know that you sent me and that you love them as much as you love me. 

 Jesus is going to a cross to endure the most horrific pain and suffering to pay MY debt, the whole world's sin debt! He endures all of MY shame, the whole world's shame. The fact that he would lay down his life to extend to me such amazing grace is love that is hard to understand. But he actually prays for ME. He prays that I will understand how much the Father loves ME. The Father loves me as much as Jesus. 


"For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16 


We all have heard this verse. It might be the most famous verse in the Bible. But do we really understand it? GOD LOVES YOU! JESUS LOVES YOU! If you were the only person on the earth, He would endure death on a cross just for you! He wants you to experience this great love. He even prayed that you would get it! I hope and pray for a spirit of revelation to come across you so that you know this great love and receive it! There is nothing you can do to earn it. It is free and it is for everyone! This great, abundant love in Christ will give you hope, peace, joy, love, and freedom like you have never experienced!  
  

God Doesn't Make Any Junk!

If you were to build your dream home and money were not object, what would you build? You could build it as big and as nice as you wanted. I would have the best granite counter tops. It would have the absolutely biggest laundry room, master bedroom closet and bathroom. I would have this huge kitchen opened up to this huge den, perfect for entertaining friends and family. I would build it to meet my needs, my dreams with so much more! It would be the perfect home for me if money were no object.

The other day Pastor Chris said something that messed me up. I have been thinking about it ever since. God created us for Him. I have always heard that we were created in His image. That alone is a mind boggling thought. I started to just let this thought sink in: the Creator of the universe decided to create man to worship and fellowship with Him. And I started to think if I could create something just for me and I could do anything, make it anyway I wanted, wouldn't I make the absolutely best thing that I had ever made. I am making something for me wouldn't it meet my specifications and my desires? Wouldn't it have the total capability to do the thing I created it to do?

That is what God did. We are the Lord's best creation, created for Him! He gave us everything we need to please Him! We were made in His image. Even though we mess up, Jesus made it possible for us to do that thing we were created to do! "For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Ephesians 2:10

I love Psalm 139, it is one of my favorites. It reminds me how wonderful we are all made! How the Creator of the universe has thoughts about me! 

¹³ For you created my inmost being;
   you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
   your works are wonderful,
   I know that full well.
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
   when I was made in the secret place,
   when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
¹⁶ Your eyes saw my unformed body;
   all the days ordained for me were written in your book
   before one of them came to be.
¹⁷ How precious to me are your thoughts, God!
   How vast is the sum of them!
¹⁸ Were I to count them,
   they would outnumber the grains of sand—

Let me tell you whenever you think you are not worthy, you're nothing, you're a failure, etc. just remember you were created with this awesome purpose, created by God for God. You were made in the Creator's image. God doesn't make any junk!

God Hears and Cares for YOU!

As I have mentioned in a previous post, I am learning how to have an eternal perspective these last few months. I decided to go back and watch some messages from a series our church did in 2008 called 30 Days to Live. What if you learned you had only 30 days to live? What would you do? Each message had a video testimony of someone who received the news that their time on earth was limited. The Treasures in Heaven message featured the testimony of Staci McAuley. She was battling breast cancer and was given less than a year to live. Powerful message and powerful testimony! I remember about six months after the message our pastor announced one Wednesday that she had gone into remission. After watching the message, I decided to google her and find out how she was doing. Unfortunately, I found out that she went to be home with the Lord in 2009. But she left a beautiful piece of her here on earth and it ministered to me. And I want to pass it on to you.

Dolphins

She keep a blog that detailed her year plus battle with cancer. But there was this one post in which the Lord spoke to me, simply titled DOLPHINS. "Sometimes when I am feeling down and I am feeling like God doesn't really care about me or doesn't seem to be listening to my prayers, I remember the dolphins." She goes on to tell how she would visit Jersey. She loved to go running and at the end of her run she would walk back along the beach to the house. One day as she was approaching the end of her run, she found herself praying, "God, thrill me today. I want to see some dolphins." She felt bad for praying for such a frivolous thing. But as she topped the dunes what did she see, 3, that's THREE dolphins playing in the ocean. I have a link to the post above.

You see, that is when I realized once again how much our Heavenly Father hears us and how much He loves us. He gives us moments like dolphins so that when we go through tough times and it seems that He doesn't hear or care about us, we can think of dolphins. For me, it is a silly shell that I found at the beach one day. I love to collect sea shells but on this one trip to the beach, there were not that many to be found. I got up out of my chair and walk to the water and I prayed, "Lord, let me find a good shell." And I walked 10 feet into the water and there it was, the prettiest crimson gray perfect fan shell sitting on the ocean floor in plain site. Amazing! I started to laugh and thank God for how good He is. If He would give me a shell and Staci dolphins, think how much more He wants to give his children. I mean He gave His only precious son Jesus for us. Oh, how He love us! He wants us to know that he loves us and he does care. God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5  We can give him everything, all of our troubles, “Cast all [our] anxiety on him because he cares for [us]!  1 Peter 5:7

Whenever you think he does not care, remember that one thing that is totally yours that He has given you. If cannot think of anything, just think of dolphins.

Endurance

Well we just finished week one of the fast. I am reminded of a verse that has been on my mind for sometime, Hebrews 12:1-3 for so many reasons, and now more than ever with the fast.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up. Hebrews 12:1-3 NLT

I am thinking about how this verse applies to our fast. We should be encouraged as we go through these 21 Days of Prayer and Fasting because not only are hundreds in our church doing it with us, there are thousands praying, fasting and seeking our Father with us from all across the nation and world. We are not alone. This "huge crowd of witnesses" is fasting with us and there are several who have fasted before. We have several of great people in the Word who fasted and God answered. We have several friends that we know now who have gone through this experience so we can do this!

We can "run with endurance the race God has set before us." We can go the distance and cross the finish line. The reward of becoming closer to our Lord is so worth it. God is hearing our prayers and there are sweet fragrances to Him. We will find favor with the Lord: "let their flesh be renewed like a child’s; let them be restored as in the days of their youth’ then that person can pray to God and find favor with him, they will see God’s face and shout for joy;  he will restore them to full well-being." Job 33:25-26  I do not know about you but I want to be renewed, I want God's favor, I want to see His face. FULL WELL-BEING. That is everything physical, soul, and spiritual. 

How do we endure when everything seems to be pulling us in a thousand other directions: "We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith." Whenever this seems impossible and satan is throwing everything at you and you are at your weakest, think about Jesus. Jesus is there with you: "But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me." 2 Corinthians 12:9

What if I slip up? Pick yourself up and go forward. "Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne." Jesus took care of EVERYTHING on the cross, EVERYTHING! NO SHAME! Pastor Chris taught about the part disregarding its shame Wednesday. Jesus took on all of the shame of the world on the cross as he hung there naked. What could be more shameful than total nakedness before everyone. The word in the King James version is despising the shame. In the Greek, that means to turn completely away from it, not think about it. Do not feel any shame or guilt if you slipped up on the fast. Jesus took all of that to the cross! Jesus is sitting next to God right now interceding for you and me. He knows exactly what we are going through.


Just when you think you cannot go any further, think of Jesus: "Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up." We can reach the finish line! 

Wednesday - Spiritual Dryness  

Eternal Perspective

Have you ever met one of those people who just love the Lord and you can really tell it. You know those people who are honestly REALLY excited about going to heaven: people who are either sick, lost someone, or just outright radically on fire for the Lord. For the longest time, I was NOT looking forward to heaven even though I am a Christian and have been one for over 20 years. I clung to the only thing I knew, this earth. I wanted to see my children grow up, go to college, get married, and have grand-kids!! I loved the Lord, went to church and thought why am I not like so-in-so about this heaven thing. I had read that we are aliens on this earth, foreigners in a foreign land but I really did not understand those verses. To be honest, I probably did but I just wasn't "feeling it". All I understood about heaven was it is better than the alternative. 

About 3 years ago, we started to go to Highlands and it happened again. I was surrounded by people excited about heaven: people who had joy and a peace that surpassed all understanding. Well anyone who has ever experienced Highlands knows that you immediately know something is different about this place. I started to learn more than I ever knew about several things, which surprised me since I have been going to church every Sunday since in-utero. I main theme that I heard over and over again was "it's a relationship not religion". Here is one quick quiz you can do to determine where you are on the religion verses relationship status: What is your attitude about church? Is it one of: I really do not like it because fill-in-the-blank; I really-need-to-go or I really-do-not-need-to-go to worship God, or I got-to-go? Man, it should be WE GET TO GO! So I started to have a relationship with God everyday rather than just when I needed Him.

Then it happened. One day during worship, we started to sing You Hold Me Know by Hillsong. I remember the most joyful feeling of "I get it." I get to go to heaven where Jesus will hold me. I understand this blessed hope that Paul and others talk about! Eternity with our Heavenly Father and JESUS! It changed my whole outlook about everything.

Now that I get it, one of the things the Lord has laid on my heart is to have an eternal perspective. To weigh everything with the thought "how does this truly affect eternity?" Does it really matter if your team wins? Does it really matter that cars break down if you can get them fixed? Does it really matter that you have the perfect pair of shoes to go with an outfit? Does it really matter that I have an opinion about something that really does not matter? Does it really matter that I win this silly fight? Does it really help if I vent to someone about work, family, friends, etc? Does this person know Jesus? I am trying to run everything through the filter of WWJD (what would Jesus do?)

Am I successful? Have I mastered this new perspective? Not hardly, but I am in a season of learning and growth. Everyday, I am getting better and better. As I pray and read God's word, it becomes easier and easier. It is becoming more like my nature; the nature that is really within me because of Christ. "Since you have heard about Jesus and have learned the truth that comes from him, throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy." Ephesians 4:21-24.

I will leave you with the verse I woke up with this morning, "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."  Matthew 6:33 ETERNAL PERSPECTIVE!

Spirit Fall

Spirit Fall from Passion 2011

My prayer and anthem during these next 21 days!

New Year, Another Year, Thank you Lord!

It is a new year! But what is so awesome is it is another year to serve my Lord. I am so excited to see where the Lord takes me this year. The best thing about serving the Lord is you do not have to wait until the new year, you can start any day, anytime. God makes all things new so even if this is July 23rd, you can start off new serving the One who created you, who loves you, who has thoughts about you, so many that that the sum of them far out number the grains of sand. The One who you are His masterpiece, created anew in Christ Jesus, created for a purpose that He planned for YOU before you were born.

Last year during the 21 Days of Prayer and Fasting, I started to write things down in a journal. The fast was a brand new experience in my Christian walk and let me tell you so was keeping a journal. When I was little, I always wanted to be one of those girls who had pretty little diaries with a lock and key, hidden (not-so-hidden under my pillow) so that no one could read my most inner thoughts. Locking it was not a problem, there were no juicy pieces of information, just blank page after another. I quickly learned that I do not like to write nor read that much. I am much more of a math person. I like puzzles, figuring out things and NOT recording the results.

During that first fast, I quickly begin to realize that when you give up TV and meals, there is a lot of time in the day and night, especially night. I went through my planned prayer times and started to read my bible more than just a quick verse or daily devotional. As I denied my flesh, my spirit began to grow. I started to read my Bible more and more. It made such beautiful sense, like pieces of a puzzle all coming together. I prayed more and more, sometimes for people and things when I did not even understand why. It was an awesome experience and I wanted to write it all down so that I did not forget what the Lord had done. I wrote down my prayer requests and checked off when they were answered. I continued to pray for the yet-to-be answered prayers throughout the year. I wrote verses. I wrote down people who God placed on my heart. I wrote down requests, revelations, and rhema moments.

What was so awesome about the experience is I now have this wonderful journal about how faithful and true our heavenly Father is. I looked at it so many times this year when I was discouraged and afraid that my yet-to-be answered prayers were going to become unanswered prayers. I would look back at the ones that were answered and I would look back to all of the other answered prayers over my life. I would reflect upon my blessings. I would read God's word and His promises. It was a true faith builder.

So here we are again, 21 Days of Prayer and Fasting 2011. I am excited about what the Lord is going to do. I decided to keep a blog for the things I want to share and a journal for myself. Will I do this everyday? Will I keep this up? I do not know, I just know God is good and He loves me. My prayer for you this season is that you come to know that too!!